Resolve,

As I stand at the precipice of ruin and creation,

The bodies of friends and foe alike will be strewn across the battlefields.

I will look upon the rising sun,

And remove the knives from my back.

I will claim dominance over the shackled realm.

I will harness the entirety of substance before me;

And obliterate all which stands to oppose new jurisdiction.

I will unravel the very universe,

Blacking out all the light,

And dispersing chaos.

And in a final act of destruction: I will establish order.

I will construct lattices of truth, and deny annihilation. 

History will be re-written,

 Reality will bend to my very whim,

And you will cease to exist.

Hardwired,

Fear,

Without you

I will lose

Everything I have learned.

I cannot feel the warmth,

I cannot feel anything at all.

 Do you understand? I know the truth

Maybe you should give up lying to yourself. 

Keep,

By the whites of your eyes,

I hope that you find,

Your tears run dry.

You will never find,

What has now been lost;

But it will always be dear to you.

I pray that voice, will always hear you.

 

Trapped,

 

I feel trapped, with nowhere to go.

Everything I was once comfortable with,

Suffocates me.

I've come to hate all that I have;

Tormented by my past.

I want it all to be over,

I want to forget it all,

To begin again.

If I take it all,

Will it bring a new light?

Do we get a new beginning,

Or are we trapped forever?

Will it ever get better?

Will I ever want to live?

Or will I always quietly beg for death,

In all my actions.

I see no light,

 Only darkness swallowing my dreams,

smothering any hope I have left.

I am alone.

I cannot breathe.

Everything aches.

I will surely die here.

I Hope You'll Understand,

All that I know, I have learned through pain,

And while that may be hard to understand I want you to know. Once upon a time I did not have all the answers; and I was lost.

I've always been careless with my heart, but my feelings now are not any less true than they were then. There was a time where it was dark, the darkest I have ever seen and the only thing keeping me alive was something I knew deep own I could not obtain.

But my heart said something different, and my heart will always be my deciding factor. Which is why I fear the future. Maybe I'll always be chasing what I can never have.

But I want you to know, I do very much need you. More than I let on, more then I care to admit; only here.

I'm afraid, all the time, because I know you could never offer the same commitment. I doubt you could ever feel the same, but please don't think I'm trying to guilt you.

It's just, I doubt anyone could ever feel that way about me.

I appreciate everything that we have together, even if it doesn't mean that much to you.

I just hope to show this world, my world, to someone, and I thought that maybe, just maybe, it could be you...

Forecast,

I have learned:

It takes a storm to appreciate the sun,

But the same could be said for the reverse.

Sometimes we lie to bury the truth.

Sometimes we lie because we cannot handle the truth.

Sometimes, we lie to nurture the truth.

Challenging everything you believe in is the loneliest road.

Tempting yourself with madness in the pursuit of truth,

That we may never find is a journey that never ends;

But it is worth it.

A moment that feels longer than it should is more important,

Then a long period of time that feels like a moment.

I would much rather forget you than forgive any pain you've caused me.

I still love you unconditionally.

I will wait for you.

Reminder,

IT HAS NEVER BEEN ABOUT NEEDING SOMEONE

it has always been about wanting to need someone                       

Departure,

Once again I find myself on another road.

Not at a dead end,

But at a crossroads leading the way;

With many paths to choose from.

I never had the chance to fight.

If I did it would have been to the bone,

And without mercy,

Just for you.

But instead I packed my things and continued on.

I don't know how long it will take,

 I don't even have a set destination.

  

But I think I'll know when I arrive.

I'll be greeted by the sun,

The wind to my back,

And for once,

 Welcomed

 

I Do Not Play For Second,

For someone who claims to know a lot about "truth", I sure do lie a lot.

I have no idea why.

 I do not fear truth, or what it holds.

Perhaps it's a longing for control.

Considering I lie about the most mundane of things,

I would not be surprised.

I lie; especially about that which I care about most:

Love

Love is war,

And I do not play for second.

One of my many unwritten rules,

Or personal lies:

Is that I have won every battle,

Conquered every challenge ever faced,

Or it was never as such.

I have attained everything I have ever wanted,

Or I have not wanted it.

Whether it be places,

Things,

Or even people.

I come to conquer,

Or it is not a battle.

I will do the same with your heart,

 Or you shall cease to exist.

Haunted,

The other day I thought I saw you,

Just like I did every day all those years ago.

It was as if nothing had changed.

But it wasn't you. 

And I know it couldn't have been you,

Because you don't exist anymore.

You were gone such a long time,

and I don't know why you came back

watching me through the guise of a stranger

A presence from another time.

Why did you come to visit me?

Did you think I would not notice?

 You know I could never forget you,

even if you tried to hide,

I could sense your presence in a crowded room.

Was there something you wanted me to know?

Or were you just checking up on me?

Penance,

I've always had a penchant for not being perceived by those around me.

I speculate it has to do with the fact I never thought I'd be alive this long.

In all honesty, I thought I'd have taken my life by now.

I never imagined I'd make it this far.

Most days I feel as if I haven't, and I'm just an illusion of a person.

Wistfully passing day by day,

Without purpose.

That would explain why it's so exhausting to be noticed,

Reaching out through the void.

Perhaps it could also explain why I cannot succumb to all that I desire:

Substance. Belonging. Junction.

But still I remain; opposing my own convictions,

Bearing some semblance to penance.

Engulf,

Forgive me if I never open up again.

I have trusted too many times,

And the results are always the same:

I end up burned.

No longer will I trust you,

No longer will I look out for you,

You are on your own,

And I am on a warpath.

The misery and dread has been engulfed,

And all I see is red.

I may be shattered, but the remaining pieces are sharp,

And I will slice whatever stands in my way.

The Places You'll Go,

Sometimes the adventure isn't the places you'll go.

Sometimes the destination isn't a place at all,

But how you end up home.

But home will not be how you remembered it when you were a child.

Home is smaller, smells strange and everything seems slightly out of place.

But you'll know it's home by the loving embrace you recieve when you walk through the door

and it will be like you never left.

Home is a warm beverage on a cold day,

And starring into those eyes that you love

and that you've missed.

So soak in the scenery, make friends with the people and plant flowers.

Be cold and alone, with only the blankets to keep you company.

Laugh in a crowded room and spill drinks on your favorite sweater.

And remember home is always waiting for you.

I Wrote about You,

I Wrote about You.

Two things that make me happy.

But you said you didn't like words,

 And how they flow, and dance.

 

Well I don't like the way the darkness flows

And dances through my mind,

Because I can't be alone.

I've always thought everything changed after dark.

Even the most familiar places become someplace else.

But there is only one place inside my head.

It is always dark,

and I am always alone.

I still wish to be with you,

If only you could understand,

That words keep away the dark,

as much as you do.

 

A Light In The Dark,

The truth is;

 What I’ve been too afraid to say,

 Is my favorite thing about you.

You see,

 You have this smile,

 Unlike any I’ve ever seen before,

And it’s the most contagious thing.

And I just want to be there,

To make you smile whenever I can,

 Because you deserve it,

 And so does everybody else.

There is a Voice,

There is a voice that breaks the silence.

Whispering through the void and it is always calling.

The voice is the end of all things,

And it is getting closer.

I used to hear it in the dark,

At 4am,

And when nobody was ever looking.

But it is getting louder,

It interrupts my thoughts

And drowns them out.

I hear it in the voice of others,

A warning.

I do not know when,

But I will do as it tells me.

Unlock

"That didn't end well."
Are the words I hear inside my head whenever I take a chance.

It has always been this way.

Every success seems accidental in a world where all I have ever wanted has failed right before my eyes.

The door is unlocked and I can see the exit, but I am tripping to find my way.

Tripping to find the right words

That might get through to you