There is a Voice,

There is a voice that breaks the silence.

Whispering through the void and it is always calling.

The voice is the end of all things,

And it is getting closer.

I used to hear it in the dark,

At 4am,

And when nobody was ever looking.

But it is getting louder,

It interrupts my thoughts

And drowns them out.

I hear it in the voice of others,

A warning.

I do not know when,

But I will do as it tells me.

Unlock

"That didn't end well."
Are the words I hear inside my head whenever I take a chance.

It has always been this way.

Every success seems accidental in a world where all I have ever wanted has failed right before my eyes.

The door is unlocked and I can see the exit, but I am tripping to find my way.

Tripping to find the right words

That might get through to you 

Hello,

I'm still alive

What I exactly mean by that I don't really know

My heart is still beating

My lungs, breathing

But everything else is cold and empty

I'm still alive

But I wish I wasn't

Lock and Key

I don't know who I've been lately, but I certainly haven't been myself. At least, I haven't been the me I always knew myself as.

I haven't let myself create for the longest time, and I couldn't do that to myself anymore.

I tend to only create, and have vision when I'm vulnerable. I like to play with it, maybe it's just a part of who I am.

But this post isn't like those other posts.

For once I'm not lost. I'm not looking for something, searching for someone or anything like that. I've finally realized that it's all just going to be okay.

I don't really have a plan, but I'm hopeful, and considering the past few months... this is good.

I want to integrate creating with being okay.

Why would I want to be scared, or lost, or hurt?

Perhaps it's because it was easier for me to cope. I mean, it's not 'Coping with Consciousness' for a reason right?

This whole time it's always been about pain. So when I haven't been there, I guess it's because I was the closest to happiness.

But it's going to be different now. I can fucking create things with more than just misery. I can do this. You can too.

That Life We Could Have Lived

I like to think of our time together as a place.

A place that nobody else in the history of time,

can ever go.

It's our special place;

At least it was.

Like with all moments in time,

We walk from room to room,

Without stopping to enjoy just one.

I know that one day, you'll try to re-trace your steps,

And visit our place.

But I won't be waiting for you,

And there will be nothing to go back to.